Do you catch yourself holding out for something better?
Are you trying to measure if you’re good enough? Are you waiting for the perfect occasion to bring out your favorite things or the real you?
Maybe you’re holding back on the good stuff, whether it’s your favorite earrings, dishes, or even your softer side. Perhaps you’re waiting for your lifestyle to improve before your attitude and outlook do, and you’re not allowing room for satisfactory moments, let alone great ones.
But your wittiest conversations and deepest belly laughs are waiting for you just on the other side of your iconic obsession with perfection.
When are you going to get real and move beyond perfectionism?
Have you gotten caught up in the endless cycle of wearing sweats, yoga pants, or pajama pants (worn at various times of day, every day)? Is your life a drudge, day in and day out?
Are you waiting for perfect conditions before you’re happy, before you bounce back, or before you hold your breath? Do you think that you should be happy because so many people have less? Are you telling yourself to chin up and soldier on, to show up every day unaffected by the negativity of the day before?
Are you continually absorbing all the negative, bad, and frustrating news? Is your diet one of sadness, despair, and loss?
Balancing Opposites – Can You Handle It All?
There’s so much pull right now, a challenge of opposites:
- Work or lack of work
- Home and extra housework or not enough space
- Errands and tasks with heightened safety measures
- Family, lack of visitors, or too many visitors
- Reduced personal space or too much personal space
- Finances, relationships, sense of self, ability to withstand, maintain, stretch, and grow.
With so many people sitting at various points of stress in their lives, it’s not always easy to know how to be ok, let alone bounce back and even thrive.
But here’s a way to start:
Start Small. Start With Hope.
Start with a little hope, by looking at what’s going well and seeing how you can repeat some of that goodness in other parts of your life. Pick a couple of little things.
What’s one little thing you can reduce or eliminate to lighten your mental load?
One way is to ditch the news. Get a trusted friend or family member to tell you anything you really need to know and turn off the news. You could even delete the app you read your news on if you want.
What else is on your ditch list?
What’s one little thing that you can start or do more of that will help lighten your mental load?
Try meditation (use an app like Insight Timer or Calm for guided meditations on a variety of topics), watch light-hearted and fun videos (YouTube or movies are good places to start), talk to someone (professionally or a trusted friend), and find connection with others who understand and accept you.
Don’t expect perfection from yourself. No one expects that you’d be living a perfect life right now. Pausing to give space rather than pushing to perfection is the best strategy.
It’s okay to not be okay, to be afraid, frustrated, and unsure. It’s okay to need a bit of space. Creating time and white space in your schedule and in your home are healthy habits. At the very least, turn down the volume or even turn off the TV and take some quiet time.
Find the small things that bring you joy (I call them joy triggers), and go on a quest to see what’s on your joy trigger list (mint tea is one of mine, fetch with my dog is another).
What little things could bring you calm and peace and hope today?
Wiser people than me have said:
Be the light you want to see in the world.
Be love, be hope, Be everything that you are hoping for
I know I know it seems like a cliche – but it’s true
You can have a challenging life, and still, focus on hope. Start by developing a yes-and outlook on life.
Start with yourself – and kindness. Be loving and kind and gentle with you.
- Reset your day as needed.
- Each day as you wake, stretch and gently dust the sleep from your eyes (also wipe the tears if they’re there).
- Get in the shower, and put on clean clothes (comfy is ok). Make a healthy breakfast. Take your meds and vitamins as needed.
- Move your body – walk, do yoga, or dance.
- Talk nicely when you talk to yourself. You got this – you are a good person, who is resilient and strong.
- Be aware of your mindfulness.
- Do something nice for yourself, and for others.
- Listen to music.
- Talk to your family and friends.
- Find the good news. Share the good news.
- Be vigilant in your self-care.
- Love your people & love yourself.
Find hope, be hope.
Being real is perfection!
Stop hunting for perfect – you are already divine, as you are, where you are.
Yes, as you are where you are. You are strong and capable and don’t need to be perfect. Give yourself the gift of hope, of peace, of kindness and indulge in getting really real. Be you, as you are where you are.
Life is unfolding right at your feet. Pause and allow it.
Find your flow – let it find you.
You got this!
Your Turn – please share your thoughts
I’d love to hear from you. Do any of these steps sound doable to you? What’s one small action you can put into practice today?
Sending you strength and love.
~ Cathy
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Feature photo by Francesca Zama from Pexels
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